Left to misery

I'm sitting in my hopeless corner,
Wishing that life would go away.
As a cold shiver surrounds my body,
As it does everyday.

I pull my legs to my chest,
And try to keep myself warm.
But this beauty is still brewing,
There's going to be a storm.

I clench my skin until it bleeds,
Will I survive this vicious attack?
As the darkness sweeps over me,
It's too late, I can't go back.

It engages in a precious fight,
The one with my heart.
As memories are re-enacted,
It helplessly falls apart.

It duels with my soul now,
Enforcing all the guilt and regret.
As I fall with such emptiness,
Those things I tried to forget.

It's battling with my body now,
And this looks and feels wrong.
Self-loathing my scarred body,
As this utter pain goes on.

It escapes my weak and fragile person,
Enough damage done for the night.
Although it is still always there,
It is never out of sight.

Tormenting, Hating and Loving it,
This screwed up demon in me.
Will never let me forget,
Left to live in misery.